Empathy

"I learned to give not because I have plenty but because I know the feeling of having  nothing." This beautiful text message aptly describes my insight for the week --- empathy or the lack  thereof in a competitive world where survival of the fittest is the name of the game.   Wikipedia defines empathy as the capacity to recognize and, to some extent, share feelings that are being experienced by another.

The past week was difficult and emotionally-challenging. Watchful, nosy eyes were on me, waiting for any sign of confirmation about my predicted failure. I refused to confront the truth about the news knowing that my reactions would easily give me away.  I did not  see the need or urgency to share something confidential,  (certainly not with a group of curious gossip mongerers). I wouldn't allow disappointment to cast any more pain to my wounded ego.

As if the anxiety of my impending downfall (not to mention a dim future) weren’t hard enough to bear, the betrayal of friends whom I once trusted and treated as family left me with a heavy heart and a damaged self-esteem. Concealing my real emotions from the rumor-hungry predators didn’t make things  easier either.

A careless remark hit me hard as I learned I was being ridiculed for my attempts to keep my PERSONAL information private. For the nth time, talk about my failure were being circulated.....

During one of those weak private moments,  I reflected on the crab mentality prevailing  in the insensitive people around me. I could not believe how cruel and mean my colleagues could be so as to carelessly trample down on someone so downtrodden. How could they rejoice in the misfortune and misery of another?

The wisdom behind the existence of life’s polarities suddenly dawn on me. How can one appreciate the good if one has not experienced the bad? How can one rise up if one has not fallen down in the first place? How can I feel for others' frustrations and disappointments if I have not gone through similar experiences/feelings myself?       

I also realized that developing sensitivity and empathy takes a lot of maturity for it is in dying to one’s self that we are able to prioritize others' needs before our own.

Human and weak as I am, how I wish I wouldn't have to go through hurtful experiences again (if only that’s possible!) .… But if these same trials would develop the strength of character necessary to face some more challenges, then how can you say no to that?